My Wildly Storied History With Blogging (Using A Pen Name)

Sometimes, the most unexpectedly amazing things come out of the simple act of putting yourself out there. [Tweet This!]

When I timidly penned that first blog post six years ago in 2009, I had no idea that this new creative outlet would lead to real-life friendships, to a run-in with Bruce Jenner at a conference, to seeing myself in an issue of US Weekly magazine. I would have laughed if you told me an interior designer would be contacting me to commission one of my photographs for her latest corporate project. Or that I'd be founding a local blogging community that would quickly surge to over 600 members.

My passion for blogging captured my heart like wildfire. I had a full-time desk job then. In between client calls, email blasts, and website updates, I was slipping into heels and a dress and jetting off to a networking event, or hurrying home so I could upload and edit 100+ photos, gathering all the elements I needed for the next day's post.

And then one day, it all came to a slow and steady halt and I quite literally felt like a piece of me was gone.

Here's where things are going to get really real. 

Since the beginning, I chose to blog under a pen name. The name was so unique, that the odds were in my favor with search engine optimization and organic online exposure.

Hiding under a name other than my own offered a superficial veil of "protection"; it was a space I was able to write as I pleased, free of fear and judgement. 

It wasn't until I took a step back that I began to see how over time, I had gotten so caught up in "her" identity. "Her" essence. I was me, but elevated. I was buying suede royal blue heels with crazy zippers on them when I'm more of a wedges and flip flops kinda girl. 

I couldn't live in the moment because everything became so calculated - what I was wearing, what I was doing. I felt the pressure to hit 'publish' when I had nothing to post about. So I'd curate a fancy dinner on the town or an outfit post, for the sheer sake of filling those quiet gaps.

Eventually, I didn't feel like me anymore. Me and my pen name began to feel like two succinctly different entities, and nothing I wanted to write resonated with the online identity I had built. My blog was built around the glitz and glam - the frequent flier miles I was racking up on business trips, the newest sugary cocktail at the trendy restaurant on Newbury Street, or the latest theme party my friends and I had planned.

So one day, without explanation, I just stopped blogging altogether.

And for three and a half years, I didn't write. 

Instead, I cultivated a new life in California.

Ironically, I thought moving 3,000+ miles across the country would fuel my passion to write, because there would be so many new places to explore. But instead, I just lived life as it happened and allowed myself to acclimate on my own terms. Yoga, hiking, becoming a dog mom, working, and meeting new people. I ran my first 5K, learned how to paddleboard, and finally went wine tasting.

In the background, I couldn't help myself. I still shamelessly read my favorite blogs, tuned in to podcasts, and kept a razor sharp pulse on local meetups for bloggers and creatives.

Finally, enough was enough and I slowly weaved my way back in, but this time, as a more authentic, confident me, with a voice I don't feel shameful about.

No pressure to write, no insecurity.

The spark is back, and I feel open.

I'm overly giddy again at the thought of a blank page, of an unfinished draft, and knowing that I can connect with others again in this medium.

The sheer myriad of topics and ideas that have been brimming and bubbling to the service for months now will finally turn into something meaningful.

What can you expect on Well, I'm combining three topics I'm over-the-moon passionate about (blogging, business, and social media) mixed with a hint of my life, goals, and experiences.

My entrepreneurial journey has been a long and interesting road, and I can't wait to share my trials, opportunities, successes, and failures as I go! Curious to learn more? Take a peek at my about page. Or, you can find me on Instagram, Pinterest, and Twitter.

Let's Chat: Have you ever taken a blogging break? Did any pieces of this post resonate with you?

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